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A Self You Can Respect

Updated: Mar 25, 2023

Have you stopped pursuing your dreams? Did something happen that gutted your confidence or did the passage of time, like it does for many, erode your sense of optimism and wear down your hope?

Each of us have dreams. Things like learning a new language, acting in a local theater group, writing a book, starting a business, asking for a raise, or creating a YouTube channel. But we fail to take that first step toward achieving them. Instead of thinking, "How can I?" we think, "There's no way."

What dreams have sat dormant in your heart? Take a minute and reflect on them. If you need help remembering, consider these prompts:

I’ve always wanted to –

If I were in charge, I would –

One of these days, I hope to –

Wouldn’t it be great if I –

What ideas come to mind when you read these prompts? Jot them down. Now look at your list. For each goal or dream, what’s the first thing that comes to mind? Do you hear positive and encouraging self-talk? Do you begin to identify initial action steps to get moving? Or do you hear a voice reminding you that it's impossible because you’re not ___________ enough. Fill-in the blank: smart, good, old, young, athletic, wealthy, creative. What’s preventing you from picking one of your dreams and going for it?

“But Tom, there’s no way. You can’t just be upbeat and positive and achieve anything you want.” Really? Is there really no way for you to pursue your dream as in 'only 12 people have walked on the moon' no way? Or are you allowing judgmental self-talk to stop you in your tracks before you take the first step? Are fears of embarrassment, humiliation, or failure shutting down your creativity and problem-solving skills before you give yourself a chance?

If you feel that your dream is too big or the obstacles too many, remind yourself no one climbs Everest in a day. It takes hundreds, thousands of small goals planned and achieved one by one to reach the summit. And here’s the secret: whether you reach the summit or not you’ll be living a life of action and possibility. The journey is where joy and meaning are found. The journey is where we discover the hero that lives within us.

One of my favorite historical figures is Winston Churchill. Prior to Pearl Harbor and the United States’ entry into World War II, Churchill stood alone against the onslaught of fascism. The strength of his personality and determination propelled England to confront Hitler’s massive war machine against the longest of odds. Here is one of my top three Churchillian quotes:

The secret to a self you can respect is to pick a course of action and not waiver from it when criticized.

So ask for that raise! Develop a business plan for your dream company. Reflect on recent losses that have dented your confidence and ask what are the opportunities? Remember-meaning is found in the doing.

On the International Coaching Federation’s website, a coaching client offers this testimony:

I think coaching is a competitive advantage and can change the course of your career.

– Lydia Henshaw, Coaching Client

Based on my experience of coaching, I’d edit that sentiment by saying coaching can change the course of your life.

The time is now to take that first step toward your preferred future and a self you can respect. Schedule a free Welcome to Coaching session with me today. Let’s explore how we can free your inner hero and get you thriving. If after our session you’re not sure I’m the coach for you-no worries. I have several amazing colleagues to whom I can refer you.

Congratulations! Today is the day you take a chance on yourself and begin pursuing your dreams. I'm excited for you!

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